Idiots at the poker table, Episode 1: Skantz
Every poker player meets idiots who are so frustrated by their total lack of poker skills that they have to let off steam in the chat box. I play on a poker room that also has emotes, and this doesn't help. Or better: it helps them to be, if possible, also more annoying. Starting from today, i'll write a review of every idiot i'll meet on my road.
The first episode is about an idiot called Skantz.
If you check his stats you will easily think that it's not strange that someone who's losing more than 4.000$ could be an arrogant, unpolite, neurotic person.
I copyandpaste the chat of our last SNG:
AKAKA wins 1,125 with: Two Pairs: Jacks, Tens
GANDRIX claps.
AKAKA: ty
Skantz: only a idot say that
Skantz: ty?+
AKAKA: he claps for me --> i thank him
Skantz: say ty after a win
GANDRIX: i m idiot yes ,is it a problem?
AKAKA: only an idiot can have your stats and being still so eager to talk
Skantz: f uck off
Skantz: u are ugly
Skantz: and hairy
AKAKA: i love u too
A few minutes later, i win a hand:
GANDRIX: may y clap?
Skantz: u res so retarded
AKAKA chuckles at GANDRIX.
Skantz: and so arogant
AKAKA: oh WE are arrogant
Skantz: u are and ugly
AKAKA: and u're such a pleasant person instead
Skantz: are youre boyfriend italian?
Skantz: what did he didnt find in italy?
AKAKA: i'm married
GANDRIX: i m gay
Skantz: akaka
Skantz: moved from uk
Skantz: as ugly she is
Skantz: and find another idiot in italy
AKAKA: actually i had an "idiot" also in the UK
GANDRIX: ii m not in italy.i m in nepal m8
AKAKA: but... my god... why am i talking to you?
Skantz: sou lived in little italy
Skantz: i guess its Berlu s conui u like
AKAKA: "sou"? is it a word?
GANDRIX chuckles.
Skantz: Fascism
Skantz: is another word
Skantz: lovelt country
Skantz: sry i mean lovely (can you believe it? He offends two persons... but he says "sorry" for a typo!)
AKAKA: we're in 2011, baby
AKAKA: live in the present
GANDRIX: berlusconi isn t fascist lol learn politic m8
liama folds
Skantz: yes and no Fascism?
AKAKA: no, he's just a criminal
GANDRIX: we have mafia only
Skantz: and berlu is not a maffia??
Skantz laughs his *** off.
AKAKA: maFia, just 1 "f"
AKAKA: and mafia and fascism are 2 different things
Skantz: and u have both
Skantz: poor ppl
GANDRIX: ok m8 y are right....and sure y know that pope has a bubble dolly in his room true?
AKAKA: we have also 5000 years of history, you have just chocolate and cheese (he's from Switzerland, my apologies for this sentence to all the swiss readers)
And again, a few minutes later:
ExpressBob acknowledges AKAKA had a nice hand.
AKAKA: ty
Skantz: hes anidiot to
Skantz: for sue
...
liama raises to 1,240 (all-in)
AKAKA says good luck.
liama says thank you.
AKAKA: shhhhhhhhhh.... don't say "Thank you"!!!!
GANDRIX chuckles.
Skantz: ask rocken1900 and wellbet what they say if u say that
AKAKA: 1) who they are? 2) why should i care about what they say?
Skantz: beacuse they are pros
Skantz: and u dont respect any
Skantz: fascist
AKAKA: oh, wow...so what they say is a dogma
Skantz: just stfu
Skantz: u are so boring
GANDRIX: if y repeat that word i ll report y m8 now stop to offend ok?
AKAKA: skantz, have u attended any special school to be that idiot... or is it a natural skill?
Skantz: ok report
GANDRIX: ok
Skantz: doggt
Skantz: doggy
Skantz: u can do it tomorow they are not awake now
Skantz: 1,5 years no chatban yet i doubt i get one now
AKAKA: is "retarded" allowed here?
Skantz: u cant say berlusconi
Skantz laughs his *** off.
...
AKAKA: gandrix, accordig to you is "loser" allowed here?
GANDRIX chuckles.
AKAKA calls Skantz a loser.
Skantz: ik girl move
Skantz: uk
AKAKA: omg... u've the typing skill of a monkey
GANDRIX: i suppose that some italian has f ucked your girl friend m8:) why so rude whit us?
Skantz laughs his *** off.
THE END
Comments
Yea. It tends to make me very happy to see junk like this in the chat box. Generally means games are good :P I'd recommend restraining from getting into it yourself though. Definitely don't comment on stats or tell them how / why specific plays are bad. Wouldn't want them to learn now would we?
Hi mates... sorry, i've been pretty busy in these days, so i've been unable to answer here.
@Henry: yep, that's a school of thought. I respect it. But actually i think that answer with sarcasm to an idiot makes it just appear more stupid than he is.
@Cool: i get your point. But i don't "fight": if someone offends me, and i answer "I love you too" i manage to do two things:
- i laugh about it, and i relax
- he is already upset, and he goes also more upset
I don't think these two things can't fit a poker game. Actually i think they could be very useful instead.
@Kaput: lol, you're right. But... i don't remember which great poker player said something like "The difference between a good player and a donk is that the donk, when he loses, thinks he didn't deserve that". And that's the point: you can explain a donk also 100 times that calling a 10xBB bet with JQ isn't a good move, but you can count about the fact that HE WON'T UNDERSTAND. A donk always thinks that he played perfectly, and that when he loses it was bad luck. Or he will think that the room is rigged...
@Brecht: yeah, i play the DoNs, but i've never seen you.
Dont get caught it up in that stuff. I used to be real bad at it and still am at times. Lucky for me my chat is banned more times than not. I find that when my chat is banned i actually play better because im not getting distracted by idiot comments. I also change my chat box to info or stats so that i cant see their chat so that way it does not bother me. But i dont know if you can do that at your site with the emotes and chat box. Bottom line everyone is a keyboard warrior and unless your going on to entertain yourself or gonna make a deal like chopping at the end of a tourney there is no reason to even chat.
As far as donk go, i got some advice when i became good at poker. My brother who was also my teacher, told me do not educate them. No reason to explain that calling with jq is a donk move, instead take their money. Because we need donks it helps us were our profit. After all everyone cant be winners.
all i can say is try not to let it get to you because tilting is bad.